Friday, 20 June 2014

My erotic dream

What did you dream last night?

A succubus entered my dreams.

What is a succubus?

A seductress impossible to resist, with supernatural powers.

Was this woman beautiful?

I don't actually remember her face at all, but I remember thinking that she was beautiful and that I was under her spell. I have a memory of her being blond and, you will laugh, going shopping with her.

How did this succubus seduce you?

We were travelling somewhere, probably to where we were to go shopping. We were temporarily alone, it seemed, in our coach carriage or railway compartment.  I remember her saying to me: "We are alone now. You can kiss me, if you want."

And did you?

I remember suddenly seeing nothing else but a perfectly formed breast, through a piece of very sheer light blue chiffon-like material.  I did as she asked in a way that I hoped was elegant and lascivioius yet restrained, because I knew we could not get too carried away.  I remember in particular the sensation of her small and erect nipple on my tongue.

Why did you think you could not get too carried away?

Because from what she said she was warning me that  our privacy would be interrupted at any time, and we were in a semi-public place.  From what I know of what is appropriate, when one is offered food that is rare and special, one ought to sip delicately at fine wine and nibble delicately at rare delicacies.

Did you nibble at this rare delicacy?

No, she said I could kiss her, not nibble at her as if she were blini with caviar.

Do  you remember any other sensation as you did this?

No, I do not remember her hand caressing my neck or guiding my head as I did what she asked, but my feelings of pleasure, gratitude and arousal were already sufficiently intense. The pleasure of imagining this sensation now is the icing on the cake.

What happened next?

We were in a department store and there was some complicated document we had to read, understand and deal with, as well as people in the store. It seems we were partners of a kind, about to buy furniture on credit or something of that nature.

What happened next?

I was having a facial in the beauty department of that store and it was she was massaging my face to demonstrate some beauty product. I know it should have been one of the girls working there, but in my dream it was her.

What were your sensations while she was doing this?

She seemed to be doing something to my lips and stinging them a little with this new product that she was demonstrating.

Did what she was doing hurt?

No, it made my lips tingle and become more sensitive.  It made me long to kiss her again.

Did you kiss her again, in your dream?

No, but I remember thinking that I wanted her to offer me her breast to kiss again, as I was seated in the reclining seat as part of the sales demonstration.

Is there anyone in your life at the moment who could have induced such a feeling in you?

Absolutely no one at all.

How did your dream end?

With a scream.

Did the dream end badly?

I believe what made me dream of the scream was a nearby crow cawing.  I did not feel fear or distress when I heard the scream, merely surprise, as I found myself waking up.

Do you often have erotic dreams?

I hardly dream at all, so this was very unusual.  I have had erotic dreams where more explicit sex acts took place, but there was nothing else beyond what I have already described.

You are saying that this was a particularly intense erotic dream.  What about it would say was intense?

My emotions and my thoughts.  Whilst waking from the dream I found myself breathing deeply and slowly in order to get my breath back as if the intensity of those emotions for their duration had made me stop breathing normally. When I finally awoke I felt I had been given a new lease of life and energy. I did not experience the usual morning stiffness on waking.

Can you think of what might have made you dream this dream if there is no woman in particular that you wish to have this experience with?

I think the dream may have been triggered by a friend telling me about what an aphrodisiac it was for him to be chosen by an attractive woman for being able to do things that he could already easily do and was prepared to do. I was quite prepared to do what this woman was suggesting.

How would you sum up this dream?

It was a curious feeling of wonder and surrender. I thought to myself while I was dreaming that I would be happy to spend the rest of my life pleasing her and then dying in her arms at the end of it.  It occurred to me too that the fate I was at the time wishing for would be similar to being her puppy and then being put down when I became too old, ill and incapable of pleasing her.  Interestingly, I was happy to contemplate accepting and indeed embracing this fate, simply for the privilege of dying in her arms.  I see now that it was a feeling of utter surrender and self-abnegation and am really rather surprised at myself, precisely because there is no one in my life at the moment that I am erotically attracted to.

Why have you chosen to share this dream?

Because it made me think of surrender in all its forms, be it sexual, physical, emotional or intellectual, and the emotions and actions they induce.  It was probably also triggered by seeing a young man preaching in the street two days ago about surrendering to God. This process has been portrayed through a kind of nuanced eroticism in Western art eg Pieta by Michelangelo.

This friend who was discussing the aphrodisiac qualities of being chosen by an attractive woman just for doing something he could easily do and was prepared to do once mentioned that it was in some way curiously erotic to lose a fight with another boy and be sat on by him until he conceded defeat.  This may have been reinforced by the way the Uruguayans all jumped on the Suarez who scored goals against England last night while he was lying on the ground in a big man heap.  I also remember two reserve Uruguayan players hugging each other as they were watching the game, which we both thought was rather gay.

Is surrender a good or a bad thing?

Sometimes it is necessary and good and other times not.  It depends on who and what you surrender to, and whether it was wise to do so, bearing in mind the nature and the motivations of what you surrender to and that surrender can be deliciously seductive.

What would you surrender yourself to?

It would be wise to only surrender oneself to Reason, Reality and Truth, which are ideals and principles, rather than the caprice of seductive women, even if they are full of erotic promises and tricks as well as capable of casting spells over you.  On the other hand, if anyone is intending to set up a honey trap for me, I want to give them an idea of the kind of thing I like.

You have now given your readers an idea of the woman you would surrender yourself to: a succubus you find impossible to resist. Is there a kind of man you would surrender yourself to?

Yes, I keep being asked by a questioner if I would accept a proposal from a wide range of different men, especially royalty, which I have no interest in. Finally, it dawned on me that I would marry a man who completely agreed with me on politics and who will be able to promote my ideas and policies much better than me. Only then would I trust him enough to completely dedicate myself to him. I would only marry such a man, I have decided. This is probably a lot less likely than my being seduced by a succubus, however.


Anonymous said...

What a wonderful story about your erotic dream! It was tantalising to read your description. May I ask if you have ever surrendered yourself to a man in your life, just as you wanted to do for the woman in the dream?

Claire Khaw said...

It was a dream of absolute submission which I have never experienced in real life. It is not something I would advise anyone to do, let alone do myself. It brought to mind what I had previously read about on religious ecstasy.

Anonymous said...

Are there any clues as to the identity of the woman in your erotic dream? Who would you like it to be?

Claire Khaw said...

It was not of a particular woman. I was trying to make that clear. I don't want it to be of anyone, and that was why I was trying to suggest an element of the supernatural and numinous. Indeed, I was thinking of sirens and Odysseus ...