I see that Mr and Mrs Boris Johnson are about to be divorced. I am happy to stand in as his new wife to make sure Brexit stays on course and give him the steadying hand he so clearly needs. It will have to be one of those open marriages, of course. I think it could work because I have always fancied myself as a political wife. If the future Prime Minister of Britain accepts my offer, I would be the third Mrs Johnson and wouldn't my friends, family, political associates and Facebook friends be proud of me!
Listening to my YouTube videos will give him an idea of personality and I welcome the opportunity of explaining those "German" photos of myself to the media and British people once and for all.
In the video below, I discuss my possible life as the wife of a future British Prime Minister. If Steve Bannon approves the match, then I believe it could work.
He won't need to waste time with the niceties of dating with me since I am happy to visit him at his home where we can discuss politics and his future career over a delivered meal of his choice. If I miss the last train home, I shall expect to be accommodated in the spare room which I intend to occupy for the rest of our married life.
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/sep/07/boris-johnson-and-marina-wheeler-announce-divorce
If you think Boris needs my steadying hand on his tiller, would you be so kind as to superimpose me next to him, please? It may help reinforce the idea that he and I are meant to be!
Thank you, person who helpfully did exactly this, who may wish to remain anonymous!
I wonder if Steve Bannon would approve of the match. The best thing to do is to let Jan Halper Hayes (@Biz_Shrink on Twitter) know of this proposed match so she can pass the message to him. Since I am now suspended from Twitter, I would be grateful for the help of readers of this blog in arranging the match.
If Steve Bannon is considering making me an offer too, he should not be shy.
Listening to my YouTube videos will give him an idea of personality and I welcome the opportunity of explaining those "German" photos of myself to the media and British people once and for all.
In the video below, I discuss my possible life as the wife of a future British Prime Minister. If Steve Bannon approves the match, then I believe it could work.
He won't need to waste time with the niceties of dating with me since I am happy to visit him at his home where we can discuss politics and his future career over a delivered meal of his choice. If I miss the last train home, I shall expect to be accommodated in the spare room which I intend to occupy for the rest of our married life.
https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2018/sep/07/boris-johnson-and-marina-wheeler-announce-divorce
If you think Boris needs my steadying hand on his tiller, would you be so kind as to superimpose me next to him, please? It may help reinforce the idea that he and I are meant to be!
Thank you, person who helpfully did exactly this, who may wish to remain anonymous!
I wonder if Steve Bannon would approve of the match. The best thing to do is to let Jan Halper Hayes (@Biz_Shrink on Twitter) know of this proposed match so she can pass the message to him. Since I am now suspended from Twitter, I would be grateful for the help of readers of this blog in arranging the match.
If Steve Bannon is considering making me an offer too, he should not be shy.
What’s in it for Boris?
ReplyDeleteHe will have a wife that is a moral and political philosopher who has identified herself with nationalism.
ReplyDeleteYou are both specialists when it comes to offending people. So, why not?
ReplyDeletePerhaps he is a likeable rogue.
ReplyDeletehe is likeable. Claire might find him disappointing though.
ReplyDeleteI am already disappointed by him.
ReplyDeletewhy?
ReplyDeleteBecause he is infirm of purpose and principle.
ReplyDeleteYou can knock him into shape, can't you? Some men like that.
ReplyDeleteThat is what I am offering to do if he marries me.
ReplyDeleteMaybe he doesn't want that? But you must find ways to persuade him.
ReplyDeleteI am sure others will draw attention to the fact that I am making myself available to him and pointing out to him my colourful past. He can listen to my YouTube videos to see if he can bear my company.
ReplyDeletestand outside his house and pretend you're a letterbox... And then pounce.
ReplyDeleteI am offering myself to him as a political consultant who is available to him 24/7 rather than an object of desire.
ReplyDeleteTaking into account your passion for spreading Islam and his skills at offending Muslims, I say go for it!
ReplyDeleteIt is actually Secular Koranism that I wish to spread. It has to be remembered that it is in theory possible to have a country without any Muslims at all practising Secular Koranism
ReplyDeleteIf God intended any country to be a theocracy, He must have intended Israel to be just this.
Being the third Mrs Boris Johnson would certainly put me in a better position to put to the British and Israeli people the benefits of Secular Koranism
http://radicalisedrabbi.blogspot.com/2018/05/the-dialogue-that-would-lead-to-peace.html
I look forward to watching you talk your way out of your selfies with guns and Nazi regalia. Should be even more fun than Corbyn trying to explain what he was doing in a Tunisian cemetery.
ReplyDeleteFor the sake of the British people both Jew and gentile, Muslim and non-Muslim, atheist and agnostic, I am indeed prepared to be subject to a thorough cross-examination of my motives in so choosing to identify myself with nationalism.
ReplyDeleteThey were not selfies, actually.
I'm sure Boris will admire your political astuteness. You have already managed to substitute the straw man of nationalism for Nazi regalia.
ReplyDeleteMe and my fellow Jews are really grateful for the personal sacrifice you made on our behalf by posing with swastikas.
I will have you know that your fellow Jew, one Yoram Hazony, has written a book promoting The Virtue of Nationalism. He and I seek to rehabilitate the reputation of nationalism.
ReplyDeleteMy view is that nationalism should be regarded as nothing more sinister than governments seeking to promote the national interest.
I am saying Civic Nationalism is really the only option, even in Israel, because God surely expects Israeli to be a theocracy.
If Judaism is divine ethno nationalism, then Islam is divine civic nationalism.
I appreciate that Boris is highly intelligent, but can you really say that the clown persona he portrays wouldn't frustrate you?
ReplyDeleteWhy a bought in meal with Boris? You seemed very clear about that point and I am curious.
I want to get down to business ASAP and find out my work conditions ASAP.
ReplyDeleteThat makes sense. Why waste time prepping, cooking, and washing up, when you have important policies to discuss.
ReplyDeleteWell I wish you luck with him, although I strongly suspect you would find him too flakey to drive your ideas forward, but perhaps you would give him some backbone.