Sane men don't want to fight but by Jingo the madmen do,
We ain't got the ships nor the men nor the money either.
We've fought the Muslims and lost before, and while we're madmen true,
We shall not find our lost marbles.
Based on the original:
We don't want to fight but by Jingo if we do,
We've got the ships, we've got the men, we've got the money too,
We've fought the Bear before, and while we're Britons true,
The Russians shall not have Constantinople.